Message from Philamon Crumpt

Fools! I laugh at your petty attempts at deduction. You, the Brotherhood have provided me with an endless source of amusement.

Did you not guess it already? I am Philemon Crumpt. And you have seen me before. What you say? You've never heard of me? Of course you have!

For I am Phil, "Mr. Los Vegas" Crumpt to you! And if you ever want to see your dear captain again you will follow my instructions to the letter. Details will be forthcoming.

Keep your stupid keys. Drink your nonsensical light. And toast.... toast your skulls.... for you never know whose skull it is you drink from. Perhaps Phineas' himself?

"Luck be a lady, tonight!"

Philemon Crumpt Appears - Phineas Missing

It is with extreme sadness that I report the disappearance and suspected death of Phineas Crumpt. The good captain was last spotted off the coast of Madagascar, shouting incoherently about Seagull poisoning. He hijacked a vessel and has not been spotted for over a week.

Being his cousin, I have taken over his correspondence and am currently settling his estate. Our hearts are with his wife Beatrice and Ozzie, Rebecca and little Zoe. Please see the attached newspaper clipping which I received on Sunday. - Philemon Crumpt